Today i loved myself. now this may sound odd but this is a rare happening. I laughed at myself, im actually pretty dang funny. I loved how i looked today, I went to the gym this morning and i loved how i felt after that. I've given up on searching for love because i only become dissapointed and self-hating. I figure I sound pretty damn desperate when i always talk about how i want love well im done looking it will find me when it finds me. Plus I've found that i have more self-loving days when im living for myself and god rather than when im looking for love and trying to look like and become something some man is going to want. I figure im a pretty desireable thing to have and someday some guy will be lucky to have me, for now ill just focus on letting go to god. We'll see how that goes, i only says this not in doubt of what god can do if i put all my trust in him, but how i will handle letting go all the control I have because I'm borderline control-freak! ~love A~
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